We Went on a Little Trip to Washington State
(Josiah's Adoption Story)
When you make yourself available to be used by God, He WILL use you. (smile)
After Silas's adoption, we felt another tug on our hearts to bring another into the family. We wanted an "adoption buddy" for Silas, being that he was the only adopted child (well, we're ALL adopted by our Heavenly Father, but that's another message for another time). We prayed for a year, asking God to lead us if it was HIS will. Everything would have to come together from the timing, to logistics, to the agency, to the finances...everything.
I remember the walk down to the mailbox, Robbie and I hand-in-hand one day back in 2020. What a year and as the world continued to get "rocky", we asked ourselves, "Is an adoption the best thing to be doing right now?" "How would we afford it?" It wasn't that our hearts weren't willing. The financial aspect of adoption is often the #1 reason families don't adopt. We arrived at the mailbox and inside was a check. Extra money we weren't expecting. I had a hunch that if we just stayed close to the Father, He was going to take care of our needs. He always has! He would provide the extra that was needed.
We started the paperwork process again and began looking into a Both Hands fundraiser. We had some amazing brothers and sisters step up and help us coordinate the fundraiser and get the word out. So many donated and blessed us. One specific large sum of money was given one random day and I remember standing over it just in tears, humbled and thankful that God was meeting our needs. I realize that while not everyone is in a position to adopt a child, we are all called to pray or give. It is a mission we can all support in one way or another.
(Skin to skin with Mommy in the NICU)
The funds were coming in and we were sitting all fall and winter of 2021, WAITING. It's easy to stay busy in the midst of paperwork and fundraising, but the WAITING is the hardest part sometimes. God was silent. Cases were popping up in our emails and we were sharing our family with birthparents, but the door kept closing. A friend shared that just when you're about to give up, that's when God shows up. And He did...
We got an email about a baby boy (premie born at 28 weeks!) in Washington State needing a forever family. The birthmother chose us and life started moving fast. It was a joy to get to speak with her over the phone a few times. As we headed to a vacation (that was booked weeks prior), we tried to relax, but were on the edge of our seats as paperwork was being done and plans were being made to fly out to visit this darling babe. It was a Mother's Day week that I will NEVER forget.
(Grandma seeing Josiah for the first time in the NICU)
Those that have adopted know full-well the stress, joy, sorrow, grieving, EMOTIONS that come along with adoption. It is a life-changing experience that you never forget. There were many moments of doubt that it may not go through, but Robbie and I were on full alert for ROADSIGNS from God. He did not disappoint and kept us focused on Him. I love watching for God's roadsigns. If we pay attention close enough, He will guide us the entire way.
God had given me many dreams about this sweet baby. Right before we found out about Josiah, God revealed he would be premature. God also had given me a dream that his name was to be Josiah. There were also some "God-winks" along the way. One of my dearest friends just happened to be flying through the Denver airport just as I was. A hug and prayer from a friend I hadn't seen in years was the biggest comfort to me as I flew out the second time (alone). This country girl is very comfortable in her old farmhouse amongst her family, friends and critters. Jumping on a plane to fly across the United States was not something I would have predicted I would be doing a few months prior! I like my feet on the GROUND, where they're supposed to be (laugh). :) God was taking me out of my comfort zone for a VERY special blessing. I put one foot in front of the other and couldn't wait to have that sweet boy in my arms!
(The first time, holding him. I remember, with tears in my eyes, asking him if he wanted a family.
It was a precious moment I'll never forget.)
I was so blessed that my mother-in-law and my two sweet daughers (16 and 12) came with me on the first trip. The girls were disappointed that they couldn't come up to visit their new brother (Covid rules), but we did find some fun things to do exploring Washington and even dabbling into Idaho for a bit. We were like the Hebrew midwives rescuing our baby boy! There was another Hebrew midwife that had been placed to care for Josiah even before me. Sweet Nurse "A". She was his primary care nurse just when he was a few days old. She didn't know who would be adopting this sweet boy, but she put together scrapbook pages and kept precious things for us from his journey that began on his birthday back in March. She loved this boy so much and we are so blessed to keep in touch with her still. Many other nurses, doctors and therapists still hold a special place in our heart.
After the first trip, Josiah wasn't ready to come home just yet. He was such a strong baby, but eating was what we needed prayer for. While the thought of staying until his discharge was my hope, I was needed at home for a bit until he was ready. Grandma, the girls and I flew home. Saying goodbye to my son was gut-wrenching. I prayed over him and knew he would be in good hands with the NICU staff. We zoom called everyday to check on him. Finally, I was able to book a flight on his due date and get back out to see him, hoping this would be the trip to bring our baby home. It was!
After a few days of pretty much living in the NICU and sleeping in the hotel across the street, the Nurse Practitioner "L" said, "I think we just have our wheels spinning here and need to get you home." I could've jumped for joy right then and there. I wanted to hug the dear soul, but wasn't sure if that would be appropriate. (grin) The next few days were spent training me on how to feed a premature baby on a feeding tube, working on discharge paperwork, being in touch with the adoption attorney regarding ICPC permission to fly home and booking a flight. My head was spinning. I was nervous. A tube-fed premie. I had never had one before, but I had successfully raised 6 babies prior to Josiah. My Mama bear instinct was brought forth, I put my big girl pants on and was ready to "do this". We had to get this boy HOME. After 3, long months in the NICU, he was going to fly home to the mountains of Tennessee and have a forever family. I was READY! I think Josiah was too. (smile)
I remember walking out of the hospital with him. It was raining and cold. Nurse "A" was like a sister to me in that NICU, making sure I had extras of EVERYTHING. I can almost here her voice still..."You're going to need extra of this and that. Oh, and I already put this into your bag for when you'll need it." I miss her. She is also a believer and when you're in a foreign city all the way across the country, away from everything you know, a fellow sister-in-Christ was just what God knew this mama needed. It was just what Josiah needed. Another "God-wink" on our journey.
I had to make two trips to get him and all our belongings back to the hotel. I was glad I had an umbrella! First was the "stuff trip", then amongst multiple tears, hugs, photos and goodbyes, I hugged Nurse "A" for the last time and Josiah and I walked out of the NICU free. We were together and free to go HOME. My heart was singing.
The attorney had submitted all our ICPC paperwork already and we were just waiting on the discharge paperwork to give us the "okay". I was planning for maybe 5 days of waiting, but it was a mere few hours and unexpectedly, we were given the thumbs up to fly home the very next morning. I called Robbie and he booked it right away. I was running on adrenaline at that point. Up all night, tube feeding a premie was exhausting, but I was beaming with excitement. We were together. I remember the most amazing moment being back at the hotel, just Josiah and I in our first hour alone, I picked him up out of his car seat and kissed him without a mask on. It was so strange, after weeks of having a mask on, I was unable to do this. I remember holding him and the tears started to flow, just standing there, Josiah and I and God. Rocking and praising Him for His goodness and faithfulness. He was getting us through this and getting us HOME. So many night time feedings when I would go visit him in the NICU, while I fed him his bottle, I would sing "I can do all things, through Christ who gives me strength". I would sing it to him, but there were moments when I needed it for myself. God was taking care of both of us. We were tired and ready to journey home.
It was that very first morning together that we got the word that ICPC went through and we could go home as soon as possible. We didn't have to wait days and days! We had a visit in the lobby from Mrs. "G" who was the one who helped him learn how to take a bottle in the NICU. She and I loved talking about the farm and tractors! (smile)
That day, I had an entire hotel room to pack up and so many things to take home in suitcases including a broad spectrum of baby formula, medical supplies and multiple handmade baby blankets and gifts from hospital nannies and staff. There may have been some sitting on a suitcase or two (by yours truly) to zip them shut (ah-hem), but we did it! I also took Josiah on our first ever Mommy/Son date to a local garden. It was so beautiful. I knew, after our first Washington trip, that that was where I wanted to first take Josiah. A garden. I took a break from packing and we drove over to the park and enjoyed a nice 30-minute walk around the flowers, fountain and giant Washington pine trees. I was going to miss this place. So many memories. Maybe someday, I'll bring Josiah back here for a visit.
Between the excitement of flying home and tube feeding a baby all through the night, I may have gotten an hour's sleep. The next morning I was up at 4:00 making sure we had plenty of time for a good feed (I had loaded up the big suitcases the night before into the rental car) and time to get to the airport. Well, my preparations were in vain because the GPS took me the wrong way to the wrong airport. I was devastated. We missed our flight. No sleep for two nights, all that hard work to get us there and the lady at the gate desk said "Sorry, they just closed the gate". I called Robbie for comfort and after a good pep talk, we were able to get tickets for the next flight out later that afternoon. We had about 6 hours to putz around the Spokane airport, drink extra coffee and snuggle together until the next flight out.
We made it to the Denver airport (layover) and made our next flight to Nashville. Coming down the escalator, I looked with excitement for my precious family. There they all were with smiles on their faces waiting to get their first live glimpse of their new son/brother. It was such a special time. I think we caused quite the airport scene and so many of the people I was on the last flight with watched our family reunite and meet this new little one. Most of the children got to take a turn holding Josiah after Robbie got first dibs. I collected my circus of suitcases and let me tell you, after a day of traveling having to carry a newborn and ALL my luggage (thank goodness for baby carriers...my third arm!), it was such a blessing to walk out of the airport with help. (grin) Everyone had a suitcase, Robbie had Josiah in his arms and we couldn't stop chatting on the elevator and in the car parking lot. It was so much warmer in Tennessee!
It was after midnight by the time we got home. The littles had fallen asleep and we pulled into the driveway of the farm, fireflies still aglow. We were all tired, but on top of the moon! The little ones were tucked into bed. They were so happy to have their Mommy home and I was happy to be back tucking them in. The big kids and Robbie and I stayed up until after 1:00 a.m. talking about the trip, holding Josiah and catching up. It was such a precious time.
The following Sunday, we were bombarded with church family (we have the BEST church family!) oohing and ahhing over him. We visited the doctor and Josiah had his feeding tube out by day three of being home. He just needed to be home with his family and after settling in, was taking full bottles and gaining weight beautifully.
(I still can't believe sometimes that I have FIVE boys! LOL Oh, I love them so.)
After being gone so much in a month, my nesting instinct took over when I got home and the house got a good cleaning (it's amazing how when you're living out of a hotel room you MISS cleaning and cooking for your family!). Some yummy homecooked meals were made and all I wanted to do was sit and hold this sweet baby, while spending time with my other children reading books (while I was gone on my trip I read to the little ones over zoom...Holling Clancy Holling books) and just catching up. The children have bonded so well together and are so protective of Josiah already. I have some amazing helpers. Everyone loves to hold a baby! (smile) His adoption didn't take long as we finalized soon after coming home.
We have been home for two months now and Josiah fits right in like a glove. He is sleeping through the night and has eased into a three-nap schedule beautifully. He is smiling, laughing and "talking" already. He LOVES to be talked to. (grin)
I know I'm leaving some details out (I will probably think of them later), but I wanted to write down his special story while still somewhat fresh in my mind. Each child's story is special and I love this blog space to be able to write and share it, coming back years later to read and remember the precious memories God has lead us through. Our little Josiah...God has brought you HOME. We love you!
Love,
Mommy
