Rob and I have been reading this book for a parent's class we've been involved in and after reading chapter 7 on "Why Reality Discipline Wil Work in Your Home", I felt compelled to share. At the end of the chapter, Dr. Kevin Lealman shares 9 ways to be your child's best friend:
1. The discipline should fit the infraction. For example, if the child misuses her allowance. When she asks for something extra before the week is out, you simply say, "Sorry, you will have to use your allowance and if you haven't any left, you will have ot wait until Saturday."
2. Never beat or bully your child into submission. Remember, the shepherd's rod was used to guide the sheep, not to wale them.
3. Use action-oriented methods whenever possible.
4. Always try to be consistent.
5. Emphasize order and the need for order. Work comes before play, chores come before breakfast, and so on. This concept reinforces obedience and emphasizes that in all of God's kingdom, there is a need for order-order is important.
6. Always require your child to be accountable and responsible for his or her own actions.
7. Always communicate to your child that he or she is good, even though the behavior may have been irresponsible.
8. Always give your child choices that reinforce cooperation but not competition.
9. If spanking is necessary, it should be done when you're in control of your emotions. It should always be followed up with explanations for why the spanking was necessary, and those all-powerful words, "I love you and I care about you."
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