Picture with me if you will...
Mother walks into Target with three, young children. Children have already been warned in the car that we are here to get two birthday gifts for OTHER PEOPLE ONLY and not ourselves. We graze down the toy aisles looking at toys, thinking what our friends would like for their birthdays. One gift down, one to go. We hit the car/truck aisle ('Please help me Lord.') Two-year-old sees the Lightning McQueen shake and go car. There's one left and it would be a perfect gift for our friend. Mom is thinking. Thinking she should have shopped with no children in the first place. No. They have to learn to buy birthday presents for others without being selfish. Four-year-old has this down pat, but the two-year-old son...right. Still learning!! Mom thinks, "Maybe I could hide it in the cart when he's not looking and somehow checkout and pay for it without my son noticing." Hmmm...nope. Not going to happen. Again, he needs to learn one of life's little lessons of giving to others. Mom knows this is not rocket science and never gives in to toy buying at Target anyway. We shop there for cereal (cheaper than the grocery store), baby wipes and other necessary items. Not toys. Lightning McQueen gets tossed into the cart because Mom knows this particular birthday boy will LOVE it. =) We get to the checkout and son hits the fan and crys because he thinks this is his toy. When Mom reassures him that it's for 'so-and-so', the cry turns into a whine, then into a full-blown fit. Mom has a wooden spoon in her purse and has taken a 'trip to the bathroom' before, but she knows she has to pay for her purchase at this point in time. Son is now laying on the floor and screaming. Mom is trying to pick him up as she's paying, trying to ignore the stares around her. She's trying to discipline her son, definately not going to cave to his rude behavior and standing firm. As Mom steps over her crying son and begins to leave the store, son comes running after her and begins to stop crying. Mom is smiling inside knowing that it worked, but still keeps an "I'm in charge" look about her face. Mother and son hug in the car.
*For those of you who have no children, you're not allowed to post a commment today. (smile)
*For those of you who have babies and think this will never happen to you because your children are going to be saints, think again. (grin) By nature, children are selfish, little guys and God instructs us to bring it out of them, teaching them kind behavior.
*For those of you who have children and everyday make it priority to discipline your kids with reality discipline, good for you.
The reality discipline from this story was that I was NOT caving in to buying my son a toy. It was not his birthday, so he doesn't get a gift. We need to teach our children to be giving and unselfish towards others. Also, the fit at the end was not cute by any means. By stepping over him, I'm telling him that he's not going to interrupt my schedule and I'm not tolerating the behavior. I was leaving the store. Plain and simple.
I was grateful that Norah and Avonlea were gems in the store. They ususally are. I did praise Avonlea for her good behavior and that meant a lot to her.
I loved reading Sheila's post today on disciplining toddlers and how much I felt reassurred that I'm doing the right thing. Thanks Sheila!!
3 comments:
Oh I so feel your pain. We (parents of smaller ones) have all been there, sometimes multiple times unfortunately. Thanks for being real with us!
I have been right there! And stood my ground that we would NOT be buying a toy for you (Caleb), but for another child. It's hard at times, but worth it in the end.
It's so hard to stand your ground, but good for you!
I'm glad you liked my advice, too. We've all had screaming toddlers. I always figure screaming toddlers don't reflect badly on the parents. What reflects badly is how the parents handle it! And it sounds like you passed with flying colours!
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